Monday, January 5, 2009

chasing clouds

y do i wake up every mornin feelin lyk wats tha point. i constantly feel lyk im dissapointin myself and everybody. i see every1 around me goin 2 skool 4 this and that making sumthin out of themseleves but i hav no self motavation wat so ever. i always feel lyk im alone and hav no1. i wish i culdve been tha student wit a 3.5 or 4.0 gpa and hav my mom b proud of me but insted i wasted my life away at skool.i hav no clue wat i wanna do when i get older. i hav no dreams or ambitions wat so ever.every1 says they r here 4 me but how come i dnt c it. im so ashamed by my looks that i hav no idea how 2 manage money becuz i stay tryna improve my image 2 impress every1. i walk around hiding tha fact that i actually hurt inside. i c everybody around happily n love but im never gonna kno wat love feels lyk becuz i waz made 2 not hav a special sum1. when i do feel lyk ive found her my need 2 b loved clouds my judgement and everything gets fucked up. i jus dnt feel lyk i'll ever amount to nething. its lyk every1 is walking fast around me but my world is so shitty that i cant keep up. i feel lyk if i vanished no1 wuld miss me lyk i never even scratched tha surface on nebodies world. so wats tha point sum1 jus tell me wats tha point.